Well, would you?
A couple of my guy friends said “eww” when I asked them, which surprised me, because you could be damn sure I would suck the living daylight out of my clit if I could stretch that far. Hell, I don’t see how it’s any different than masturbating the good ol’ fashion way. A hand, a mouth, what’s the difference?
I didn’t think sucking your own dick was a physical possibility until I saw the movie Shortbus (a great little movie by the way).
The reason I bring this up is because I was reading an interesting article today, The Epic Battle For Wikipedia’s Autofellatio Page, and I was struck silly by a few facts and interesting images.
Did you know… ?
Out of the over 3.8 million articles Wikipedia says it has now, the page for “autofellatio” is the 3110th most visited.
And that…
There are 16 photographs categorized under autofellatio on Wikimedia Commons, Wikipedia’s sister site and a resource of over 12 million freely licensed images that are used or could be used in Wikipedia articles.
Damn, and here I thought that Craigslist was the mecca of dick pics. Until today, I didn’t even know Wikimedia Commons was a thing, but it’s there, it exists in this virtual world or ours and the place is crammed to the hilt with dick pictures.
If you look up “autofellatio” on Wikipedia, there’s a special treat waiting for you; a picture of a guy sucking his own dick. It reminds me of that playground joke… you know the one: “if you looked up stupid in the dictionary you’d find a picture of yourself.” Only this guy isn’t stupid; he’s really flexible, and unlike the stupid joke, he actually wanted his images to be the own associated with auto-dick sucking.
It wasn’t an easy goal to achieve though, Jizzman, as he is known around these parts, went though many trials and tribulations to be the face of autofellatio. He kept uploading pics of himself with his dick in his mouth to Wiki Commons in the hopes that is picture would be chosen and he could be crowned prince of oral masturbators around the world.
Jizzman’s initial uploads were never chosen to grace the page of Wikipedia’s “autofellatio” entry though, and frequent uploads and minute changes to his growing number of submissions got him banned from the site a number of times, but like every good man with a dream Jizzman wouldn’t give up and his persistence would eventually payoff.
Back in 2009, the first “autofellatio” picture was flagged as violating copyright laws as proof was uncovered that it was a scan of previously published work. Jizzman quickly set himself up as a potential replacement:
I don’t have professional equipment or anything, but I have taken photography classes.
I’d be willing to make a photo based on guidelines or criteria that you can all agree on for how you would like the image to look; i.e. position, camera angle, depth, and things like that.
Let me know if you’d like my help.
Jizzman submitted another photo of his autofellatio skills and it went through. At last, success. A perfectionist as well as an exhibitionist, Jizzman wasn’t satisfied and he soon submitted another picture, which is the images millions of Internet users now see when they look-up “autofellatio” on Wikipedia.
